The Pixels

Elemental Video Game Critiques

“Video Game Islands You Wish You Were Quarantined On”

7 min read
Video game islands, love 'em or love 'em even more, they'd be great places to hang out on quarantine. These are a few isles where we'd place our butts.

 

Of all the places to put your butt, islands are among the best.

It’s tough not to feel a sense of wanderlust while in lockdown, at least for this writer. Growing up on an island, I could retcon my childhood to essentially just be one long quarantine. Instead, I find myself wishing I could isolate myself out in nature, on some jewel of a rock surrounded by wet cerulean. And also video games.

So here’s a list(icle) of some video game islands I for one would love to self-isolate on, pandemic or no pandemic.

But first, if you want some listening material as you read, hit play on this (and also subscribe).

 

 

Koholint Island, The Legend of Zelda: Link’s Awakening

Can’t get sick if you’re a solipsist! Koholint is your dream getaway, complete with the classic shipwrecked experience, beautiful island natives, talking animals, and the biggest all-you-can-eat omelete buffet you could ever want. Whether because of the original or the remake, Koholint was the very first island to pop into my head. I wonder if the same was true for the Wind Fish?

 

Round Island, Final Fantasy VII

submitted by the Hyperactive Coffee Mage

If you thought cruisin’ the USACalifornia… a realistic fantasy world in FFXV was cool with a trio of cool dudes, imagine spending your quarantine on an island with not a trio but a bakers’ dozen of hot cross buns. The thirteen knights of the Knights of the Round summon ought to be plenty of company, and you only need a gilded chocobo to get there. Question: if the summon in the original was really longish, and the Midgar sequence alone is a full game in the remake… how long will Knights of the Round in HD be?!

 

Giant Island, Breath of Fire II

You know what’s a great use of all your downtime right now? Playing Animal Crossing Grinding for experience points. Giant Island isn’t even on the map, if I remember right, but it has celebrity cameos and more megafauna than you can shake a pointy stick at. Only accessible by grandpa whales.

 

Yoshi’s Island, Super Mario World 2: Yoshi’s Island

Finally, an island where you can act your age. Note that the Yoshi’s on Yoshi’s Isle practice their social distancing from each other, each occupying a separate stage, though it’s uncertain yet as to who risky it is to put literally any living thing you come across into your mouth. Check the WHO and CDC for info.

 

Nowhere Island, Mother 3

-submitted by the New Age Retro Mage

An idyllic place with content people. Until strange pig masked people come.

 

Adventure Island, Adventure Island

Maybe the most authentic island experience on our list, Adventure Island’s Adventure Island has skateboarding (with a helmet), throwing blunt objects, and eating lots of food. Master Higgins is my spirit animal.

 

Ridorana Cataract, Final Fantasy XII

submitted by the Hyperactive Coffee Mage

Pharos at Ridorana is about as far as you could get from civilization and it’d technically mean perfect self-isolation, minus the monsters and spooky stuff. But you can’t beat that view!

 

Mirage Island, Pokémon Ruby

submitted by the Z Note Mage

I spent countless hours just collecting Pokémon as a kid; which is how I think stumbled upon the island on my first try. I didn’t know it was rare at the time to come across, and I remember going there multiple times haha. Lots of Wynauts there and a specific berry that’s supposed to be the best to make pokéblocks.

 

Kattelox Island, Mega Man Legends

Those wanting a little more adventure in their quarantine may want to opt for the legendary Kattelox Island, home to high-flying escapades and Indiana Jones-esque quests, and also potentially isle-wide genocide at the hands of robots. But hey, if you like to live your life on the edge, Kattelox is a great place to crash land.

 

The Island of Myst, Myst

Despite being unable to properly spell the word “mist”, the Island of Myst is the thinking mage’s quarantine zone. Tons of puzzles and intellectual challenges to keep one’s mind sharp, as well as musing over the Jules Verne references. Myst may be more foreboding than the rest, but don’t forget that this was a game for adults, so if you don’t like it, either grow up or go back to playing baby games, kiddie-poo.

 

C Island, Star Tropics

submitted by the One-Winged Mage

When I hear the term “videogame island” the first thing that pops into my mind is C Island from Star Tropics. A nice little peaceful island with a single village in it that looks like a great place to relax… That is, until you enter its cave where everything is trying to kill you, including a giant snake! While there are many islands in this game, C Island remains memorable for its unique shape, plus it’s the first one you land on. Oddly enough, it’s the only one with a helicopter pad as well.

Unnamed island, Rime

If you’re feeling emotionally constipated, let this unnamed island be the laxative of your temperaments. While there’s little rime or reason as to why someone would want to quarantine here, you can at least enjoy a moving tale of loss during your stay. Remember that? Actually, I’m gonna need a minute.

 

Spring Island, Rune Factory: Tides of Destiny/Oceans

Spring Island isn’t for everyone, particularly those with springtime allergies, but it has a few perks that ensure it lands a spot on this list. One, it’s teeny tiny. Like you can walk its circumference in less than a minute. Two, you can grow your own food here. Three, it has a handy, tree-portal back to the real world which you can use to shop at GameStop for your essential retail needs.

 

Windfall Island, The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker

The only series to land two spots on our list, which really speaks to a deep and abiding love of islands in the Legend of Zelda, I guess, Wind Waker’s Windfall Island has a bunch of potato-faced natives that you’ll quickly be able to dominate and tyrannize in a short period of time. If that’s not your thing, you could just run around and smash their private property like pots or take their rupees from them.

 

Archipelago, Chrono Cross

You want islands? Chrono Cross TWO parallel universes full of islands! One of my favorite hang out spots would be quiet little Arni Village with its rustic, back-to-earth nature, friendly neighbors, and vibrant coastlines. Just watch out for panther attacks.

 

Destiny Islands, Kingdom Hearts

Ever live somewhere and feel like it’s your destiny? This island full of kids has got it all: creepy caves, clubhouses, silver-haired bishounen, blitzball you’re not forced to play, and desperate longing for your friends you’re separated from. Honestly, what could be more like a quarantine than that?

 

Zeal Kingdom, Chrono Trigger

I wanted to spend forever here when I first saw it, and that feeling has never left me, so of course Zeal makes an appearance on our list. It is technically a bunch of islands, albeit floating ones. If you look at that image and hear “Corridors of Time” playing in your head, I want to be your friend.

 

Magic Isle, Animal Crossing: New Horizons

Ok so the cat’s out of the bag. This whole article was just a ruse to get you to care about my island I’m spending so much time on in New Horizons. My Switch friend code is 1741-9438-1507. Come to visit me and you can have stuff. Just please come to visit. Quarantine has been lonely. Play the game in a game and find all of the sprites I’ve scattered across the island. MY island. Where I am king. Tom Nook owes ME money!!

(QR codes post coming soon… so stop bugging me)

And that’s it for our list! Surely there are more video game islands worth visiting and staying on for indefinite periods of time?

What video game islands would you have included in a list like this?

Thanks for reading! Stay healthy. Stay safe. Stay indoors.

 



Red
formerly ran The Well-Red Mage and now serves The Pixels as founder, writer, editor, and podcaster. He has undertaken a seemingly endless crusade to talk about the games themselves in the midst of a culture obsessed with the latest controversy, scandal, and news cycle about harassment, toxicity, and negativity.
Pick out his feathered cap on Twitter @thewellredmage, Mage Cast, or Story Mode.

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